1Jun

The Allergy Haze

I’m caught firmly in the Allergy Haze, a spiderwebby mesh of too-tired days with the sneezing and the itching and THE ITCHING and HUSBANDS ARE SUPPOSED TO SUPPORT THEIR WIVES, WHY WON’T YOU LET ME SCRUB MY EYEBALLS WITH STEEL WOOL? I’ve spent the last week living vaguely and dreaming of Rip Van Winkle. I like to think I’ll wake up tomorrow to find I’ve been asleep on a mountain of laundry for the last twenty years; at least by then, allergy season will be over. Right?

I hate wasting away like this. Letters (well, e-mails anyway) languish half-written in the back of my mind until they simply dissolve. Chores pile up, quite literally, and my girls veg in front of the TV while I pass out. I supposed it’s comforting in some ways to know that this is all the result of those damn histamines and not, say, my unbelievable suckness as a person. Yet, my friends? The suckness is overwhelming.

I will be back. Promise. Just as soon as I’m done swabbing my ears with ice picks and sneezing out the final remnants of brain matter.

(Do you suffer from allergies? Feel free to commiserate.)

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5 comments

  1. I understand completely. I woke up around 8 on Saturday and got Conlan up for breakfast. By 8:30, I was asleep again on the couch. Conlan isn’t much for parking it in front of the TV, so I dozed in and out only to find tissue boxes completely emptied out onto the floor and folded clothes scattered all over the place. Conlan is one of those kids you can’t turn your back on. He’s a little artist and likes to “create” whenever he can. We keep the crayons where he can’t reach them. 🙂

  2. Allergies,
    Thanks for allowing Bethany to play hostess-extraodinaire, tour guide, and master chef (the agriturismo got lots of press, but lunch was spectacular in its own right) before attacking.

    Bethany,
    Hope you feel better soon.

  3. Allergies SUCK giant green donkey dicks. That is all. (signed, a fellow sufferer)

  4. Over the last couple of years I have developed really allergies and it is miserable! My head feels like my brain is trying to push itself out of my head and my eyes feel alternately dry and itchy like crazy. And even the so-called non-drowsy allergy medicine gives me medicine head. I hope these pass soon for you!

  5. Kelly – Conlan might still be small enough to fit in one of those little pet carriers. Throw in some snacks and a toy or two — problem solved! 🙂

    Tom – Master chef? Wow, we need to have you guys over more often!

    Lizardek – Thanks, now I have this image in my head that makes me alternately giggle and vomit to death. At least it takes my mind off the itching!

    Hugo – My allergies are also a fairly recent development. (Serves me right for being smug when all my college friends were sneezing their brains out.) At least medicine head is better than allergic fiberglass head!

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