Factory Guy is somewhat of a legend in our little family. (I’m sure you’ve experienced his handiwork too. Those rolls of wrapping paper without a cardboard cylinder for support? Zippers that stop two inches down with half your pants in their jaws? Super glue that remains wet and sticky on your cracked vase five hours after application even though it permanently affixed your fingers together in .3 seconds? Plastic wrap that stretches and rips and ties itself into sailor knots rather than tear neatly? Juice boxes that erupt if you so much as breathe near them? Packages of fragile computer equipment that can only be opened with a chainsaw? Inanimate objects that fill you with such rage that you will go on a killing spree if you can’t find SOMEONE to blame? Factory Guy.)
He’s been working overtime this week in our household. We’ve had:
A broken car window,
A stolen GPS,
A snapped guitar string (as Dan was going onstage, of course),
A shattered teacup,
A shattered coffee cup,
A bathroom flood,
Defective diapers,
Lost earphones,
A suicidal laptop,
A suicidal MP3 player,
Computer viruses,
More computer viruses,
Still more computer viruses, and
A doorway that planted itself directly in front of my little toe.
And it’s only Friday.
I just figured I owed you an explanation of why, rather than blogging this week, I’ve been out spreefully killing. (Factory Guy’s next.)
Too bad the doorway wasn’t padded. Fortunately for the world, the brits are trying to make up for factory guy’s effect on humanity…by padding lampposts!
In our house we call it the War Against the Inanimate. They win all the time, the bastards.
hahaha factory guy! I love it!
I think we all have weeks like this…I’m sorry yours was…sometimes I think all we can do at times like these is laugh, shake an angry fist at factory guy, and hope next week gets a little better. Here’s hoping! xoxo