Yesterday evening, I was dusting the living room in a flurry of last-minute prep for our annual white elephant party. Sophie was finally sleeping after an asthma attack that reallocated our afternoon to doctor’s offices and pharmacies and tight-throated cuddling, and I was dashing through my list of chores when the obscene bleat of a bus horn sounded outside the window. The dust could wait; I peeked over the balcony to see what the fuss was about.
In typical Italian fashion, someone had parked a car with courageous disregard for either logic or legality, i.e. – in the middle of the road. I watched for several minutes while the driver was procured, she failed to produce any keys, and various angry motorists contributed to the solution by honking while a neighbor pushed the car out of the street. I am sorry to say this little story has nothing whatsoever to do with this entry except that while standing on our balcony overlooking our city’s hills and valleys, I noticed something: no Christmas lights. Out of the thousands of houses visible, only one or two sported a strand of red bulbs on the balcony.
Italians celebrate Christmas jubilantly and with glad tidings of tiramisu and wine, but outdoor decorations just aren’t their thing. And while I love living in this warm-hearted country, I really miss driving around on December nights to ooh and ahh over twinkling Christmas displays. I also miss parades and candy canes and gingerbread mochas and a children’s section stocked with gorgeous holiday books.
The past two Christmases here, I felt desperate to hold onto that melted-butter sensation of holiday nostalgia. I planned red and green and cinnamon sparkles into every day, but I only found exhaustion where enchantment was supposed to be. So this year, expectations have been called back from Jupiter. I’ve been up front with myself about the traditions I miss, and I’ve whittled down my priority list to the essentials. Cookies are no longer on it, nor is our Christmas Eve brunch with friends. To tell the truth, this December looks as glitzy in my mind as a rain cloud. A hormonal one.
Yet this clammy, gray mindscape is exactly where nostalgia decided to find me. Maybe I just needed to release the pressures of baking and printing newsletters and feeling holiday cheer, damnit, or maybe the gloom of the last few years was simply another side-effect of my depression pills. Either way, this coming Christmas has been a reason to seek out magical moments in otherwise ordinary days—postponing naptime to decorate the rug with paper scraps, sitting down at the piano with Vince Guaraldi, brainstorming ways to make our friends and family feel loved… belting out carols when traffic fills the horizon (“Away in the ranger” is Natalie’s favorite; Sophie’s is “Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle bells, all da waaaaaayyyyyy!”)… anticipating the daily surprise in our advent calendar… reading a story each night that leads to the miracle birth we celebrate… sprinkling nutmeg on my coffee and calling it a success.
And as it turns out, twinkling yard displays are not the slightest bit necessary for a holiday to be merry and bright.
“anticipating the daily surprise in our advent calendar… reading a story each night that leads to the miracle birth we celebrate…”
That’s cool, we’re doing both an advent calendar and reading the Jesus storybook as well! It is a very good book, isn’t it?!
It’s all about what takes you to your happy place. Paper snowflakes do it! Carol belting does it! Good for you for finding the essentials and celebrating the heck out them. 🙂
When I try to picture what it would be like in a different country celebrating Christmas, I come up blank. I have never had a Christmas away from the place where I grew up. But, your post reminds me that the most important things are in your heart and it really doesn’t matter if the “extras” are there or not. When my kids were little, we left the ornaments off the tree (for obvious reasons). I didn’t decorate with all of the things that hide in my basement all year round. I still don’t. I don’t need a Christmas candle on every table, or a Christmas Village, or little Christmas trees in all of the bedrooms. What is important is that we are here together. But, um, COOKIES? They may very well be necessary. 🙂
Megsie is smarter than I am. I felt like it was too pathetic to NOT put the ornaments on my tree, but I’m going to have to take a picture…the shiny red and silver globes are too tempting for my boy! They have all been stolen away and relocated.
I love seeing all the outside lights here, but my family has never done it. I wouldn’t have the faintest idea on where to start…and I am loving your car-carolling. Christmas songs are the loveliest things, even when you’re away in the range! 🙂 The secret to a non-crazy-making Christmas is doing whatever makes it good and manageable in your own life…and it sounds like you’re doing wonderfully!
christmas in another country… jinja, uganda: we spent christmas eve last year at a restaurant called Flavours… outside in the garden at a table with another couple and another friend who was there adopting two orphan boys. it was warm, with a slight cool breeze, and citronella candles to keep the mosquitos away. afterwards, we met up with a group of people to go caroling to all the missionaries in the town. we walked down dust filled streets (me, in my inch and half heels) to house after house where we carolled outside the gates until the “es-kar-ee” (the guy who opens the gate) let us into the yard. there was just enough of a breeze to feel cool enough to have been a warm christmas in houston, and somehow the lights from inside the houses and the families standing on their porches to listen to our songs brought just enough surprising christmas spirit to really feel like a true christmas eve. it didn’t hurt either to all gather together afterward at a well decorated home for christmas wassail and sugar cookies! i’m glad to be back in america this year to enjoy driving through christmas lit neighborhoods. Now i just need to find a good wassail recipe!
Love hearing your stories! 🙂
Lindsey