Autumn whooshed into town today, leaving skid marks across our last short-sleeved morning. Apparently it never got the memo that seasons don’t change for another week, and the sky is suddenly damp gray flannel, steadily leaking rain. Goodbye, summer. We hardly knew ye.
This morning was also Natalie’s first day of public school. I was a little worried dropping her off, not knowing how she would take it… by which I mean not knowing how I would take her taking it. I had cut out a tiny pink paper heart in case she needed some extra love to carry throughout the day, and I fingered it in my pocket as we got near the school. But lo and behold, her classroom was brightly lit, flitting with color and activity exactly as a classroom should. The teachers were all smiles and showed us the cubbyhole to put Natalie’s backpack; by the time we turned back around, she had already plopped down in a cluster of children around the train set. That was it. No fanfare, just my independent little girl setting out on her 19+ years of formal education without a look back.
I took a deep breath then headed out for a quick cappuccino and the most effortlessly productive morning I’ve had this century. I cleaned, read with Sophie, and spent an unbelievable two (2!) hours uninterrupted at my desk. And before I knew it, Natalie was home with her daddy for lunch.
“The teacher told me she cried at breakfast,” Dan informed me. “But just a little. For a first day, it went great.” Positive assessment aside, I couldn’t help imagining my sweet three-year-old sobbing into her juice. I felt an unmistakable twinge of that guilt parents get for subjecting their children to life, even in all its goodness. She must have felt so lonely; would she even want to go back?
I sat down at the table with Natalie and asked her to tell me about her day. She broke into a huge smile and announced, “I was such a big girl! I was a crying big girl! Can I cry at school again tomorrow?” Sure thing, kid.
So the pink paper heart is now on my desk where I can see it throughout the day and think of that brave, articulate, hilarious girl I love so much. And if I ever had a doubt on the subject, I’m now convinced that Natalie has the kind of heart to take on the whole world.
You’re not a big girl until you’ve cried in school! 😀 Yay for first days!
Oh, SO cute. I love her first day outfit (with the little pj pant sticking out underneath)! We sure have come along way from smocked, poofy sleeved dresses. 🙂
Sounds like a good first day to me! Is the smock for all day or for art? And do Italian schools have a slipper requirement?
Liz – I think I’m mostly glad for first days being over and school-year grooves starting. Success!
Kelly – Actually, those are jeans decorated with little felt flowers at the bottom, but I like the pajama pants idea! I guess they wouldn’t be very obvious with the smock on, and WAY more comfortable. Hmmm, maybe I should go put on some pajama pants now…
Julia – The smock is for all day. I’m told it was instituted to keep teachers from being prejudiced based on their students’ clothes, but now it’s more for general cleanliness. And the kids wear regular shoes, though I think I’d prefer slippers. How comfy!
What a beautifully told story, so full of pink-heart love.
Oh Bethany, she is so precious and beautiful all at the same time. And a huge congratulations to you…school must mean she is potty trained!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am thrilled for your family (and yes, I will email you back at some point before my baby is born!)Lindsey
Mibsy – I love that! “Pink-heart love…”
Lindsey – Yep, potty training finally clicked, like, three weeks ago. Nothing like cutting it close! (And your line of exclamation points is exactly what my mind was doing the first time she trotted off to the potty on her own.)